Are you Brazilian in Bed, with lovemaking techniques as sensual, rhythmic and full of meaning as the samba? Or are you more French between the sheets and view sex as a highbrow expression of the self every bit as rich, complex and meaningful as Ballet. By visiting the K-Y passport control at areyoubritishinbed.co.uk and answering questions such as ‘How Long is Long enough and ‘has your genitalia ever been spontaneously applauded’, young British couples can determine their true sexual nationality and introduce K-Y’s new Touch Massage oil into their lives in the process.